A life of detours

I actually don't enjoy this part - I'm referring to staring at the row after row of numbers representing your prelim scores and trying to form a picture in my mind of what your expressions will be like when you see the same numbers later. And this is not even the worst part. The worst part comes next Feb, when I would actually have to present your O level result slips to you. I don't know what my feelings will be like then. Better not to think about it now.

Soon, you'll need to make some plans about where to venture to next. JC? Polytechnic? The choice is dazzling, even infuriatingly confusing. I don't know about you, but really it is tough to have to make such a decision which might affect your future, when you're only 16/17. Does anyone really know what he wants to do for the next 20 years of his life when he's 16? I know I didn't.

I chose to go to a JC because no one had advised me to consider the polytechnic. All my friends wanted to go to a JC. And I didn't even have a distinct clue which JC I should choose. So I picked the one where my friends were going. Up till now, I am still not sure it had been a good choice. It's an excellent JC by any standards, but I can't say it's a place that suits my personality. Ah, but it's too late to wonder about the "what if's" now, isn't it?

As for the course of study, I didn't have a clue either. So I picked the one I didn't mind - not one I was passionate about, because there wasn't anything I was passionate about then. I was an angstsy teenager, full of dissatisfaction with the world and nothing agreed with me! So it was Physics, Maths, Further Maths and Computer Science for me. Why? Because I hated Chemistry, Economics, and Biology, that's all. I didn't really enjoy my A level subjects, except for General Paper. Still, just because I didn't like the other subjects very much didn't mean I should neglect them. I was extremely competitive, didn't like to lose out to others, so I studied hard, got enough A's that I needed to make me feel good, and that was it. 2 years of JC, gone in a flash. Mostly uneventful, and quite a bore if you ask me.

I think I only knew, truly and unequivocally, what I really wanted to study after the A levels. I knew it was English, fuelled by my exposure to General Paper. So my pure Science background, and double Maths foundation notwithstanding, I plucked up my courage and finally pursued my dream at NUS. I didn't know what I could do with a degree in English (teaching wasn't in my radar then). I just knew I gotta do English. Period. It was a watershed decision for me - switching from Science to Arts but it was my shining moment! I never felt more fulfilled.

What's the point of telling you all this? Just this - don't agonise so much over what and where you're going to study next. So what if you make a detour in your life? I made a few already, and the experiences have been interesting and enriching to say the least. I am equally comfortable with Newtonian mechanics as I am with transformational grammar. Life is about giving yourself second and many more chances. Life is short, so smell the roses wherever you are.